Anger Management
Facing our own anger・・・
All day long, we live with our emotions.
What is anger・・・
There is no person who has no anger.
It's okay to be angry.
It's a defense mechanism to protect ourselves.
FFF・・・Fight, Flight or Freeze.
Emotions of delight, anger, sorrow, pleasure.
Emotions are connected.
Anger Management
Anger Not being regretful of it
Controlling your emotions improves business performance.
Learn to master anger
Not get angry when it is unnecessary.
If you're angry because you want to communicate something,
that thing is not being communicated.
In 1970, it came to Japan from America.
Visualization of emotions
In America it is common practice and Anger Management is used in many different places.
4 angers that become a problem.
・Strong Gets angry at little things
・Persistent Nagging
・High frequency
・Is agressive
Get yourself on your own side by getting to know yourself.
The person who got angry will forget
But the person who was on the receiving end will not.
Visualize whatever it is that really got you angry and heated up.
Visualize the things that frequently bother you.
↓↓↓Anger Log↓↓↓
What happened The actions you took
What you wanted the other person to do
Your own feelings.
Anger Management
１）Action control
6 seconds at most
Your adrenaline goes up 4-6 seconds at most before calming down.
Coping Mantra
Think of an incantation to get through problems.
In my case・・・ That person's good points → Things I don't like
Example) This person is wonderful. But there are some things I don't like about them too〜♪
Quantify anger
This anger is a "5" etc..
Anger is a "secondary emotion" !
The "primary emotion is
overflowing!!! sadness, loneliness, envy, hopelessness・・・
↓↓↓Under that isI↓↓↓
I want to live free of stress, I want to be healthy, I was to be cared for, spoiled, expectations, peace of mind.
53％of murderers now are murderers of their own family!!! Why does my own family not even understand?!
It's about communicating the primary emotions (=it's love)
Japanese=You should be able to understand without me saying it →Irritation
These "should's" = What's right in your own mind.
Example: People "should" greet others. People "should" do it on their own.
Know your own "shoulds", your own expectations.
People get angry at the gap between reality and expectations.
２）Controlling your thoughts (circle 3 times) F
Forgivable zone
Somewhat forgivable zone
Unforgivable zone
The problem is when those lines are blurred
The other time was okay. Today I'm angry. Stepped on a landmine.
My mother spoils my older brother but its angry at me. It's unfair.
３）Fork in the road
Reasons that can change
Reasons that can't be changed
Important Important
Not important Not important
By when?
Can you change it?
How?
How much?
Disposition
A person close to you →Think you can control them.
High Low
Shouldn't do
・Reprimand based on moods
・Bring up the past
・Blame others for the cause
・Say "always" or "never"
・Put down the person's character or personality→Reprimand only the behavior
・Change YOU messages into I messages. Speak in request form.
・Ambiguous→ Specific